20120124

The audience of One

So much for not liking wet and muddy trails.

Snoopy-danced eight miles through Francis Beatty trails this afternoon. It has been awhile since the sun is out. The warmth feels so good.

While I was on trail, I had a moment of self-awareness. I caught myself composing my facebook status, which I was going to post after the run. Up till that moment, I've always considered my solo-runs as times to unplug, to be quiet, and to be prayerful. Maybe not so much. It is both sad and absurd to postulate that everything I do, I do it with the mindset of a show and for the applause from others.  What would I do differently if there's no facebook audience or twitter following? Will I still run marathons/ultras? Will running still be a source of joy? What if there's only the audience of One - only between me and God?

While I love my friends -- they are the one that keep me going to the point of loving every painful, air-gasping moment, I firmly believe that the purpose of everything we do only comes from God. I run, not because I need to be on par with or beat my friends, but because it is a gift and a fuel from God.


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