+FillUs

“Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.” 1 Peter 5:6-7 Not being able to run has been wearing me out. Over the past couple weeks, I have been in a mood swing from normal to grumpy, angry, and depressed, with a burst of energy inside me having nowhere to escape. Fortunately, I’ve found my long-lost best friend, the swimming pool. There I channel my physical energy and acquire a quietness of mind. Yesterday at Julia’s Coffee, I found this card with the scripture: “Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you” (1 Peter 5:7). I thought of my injury immediate and was comforted by the fact that He cares. But as I went home and read the context, I realized there were much more. The verse preceded it says, “Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at proper time he may exalt you” (1 Peter 5:6). Peter was speaking to shepherding f...

Reading The Pig That Wants To Be Eaten, a book of thought experiments illustrating philosophical and ethical problems, I found this lifeboat metaphor that goes something like this: You are one of the 10 on a lifeboat that holds 15, fully equipped with food and resources. Since the rescue mission is already one its way and expects to reach your lifeboat within 24 hours, the captain of the lifeboat (if there is such a thing) suggests that all of you can just relax, and take your portion of supplies, or even a little more if necessary. While everyone is nodding in agreement, you see some distance away there are people still in the water waiting to get on a lifeboat. A good person that you are, you raise your hand and asked: “Why don’t we paddle over there and save a couple more people on our boat?” Some seem to be offended by your suggestion and look to the Captain. The Captain in his infinite wisdom replies, “Well, it is not our fault that they have not been rescued, nor is it our fault ...

As soon as I crossed the finish line, I was ready for another marathon. It wasn’t because I just had the best marathon in my life or I just qualified for Boston. Quite contrarily, I just limped four very painful miles to the finish, failed to break four hours, one of the two goals of this marathon. The other goal? Crushed as well. I wanted to remain injury free. From the very start, I followed the 4:00 pace group faithfully until the pacer had to take a bathroom break. So I continued on my own, checking my garmin from time to time to make sure I stick to a pace between 8:45 and 9:00 min./mile. Discomfort started kicking in at about mile 13, but it soon built up to pain. I knew I was in trouble but I couldn’t tell much beyond that. Somewhere between mile 16-18, I realized my running form changed due to tensed muscles from pain. One step at a time; one foot before the other. That brought me to mile 19. And Mile 20. Earlier during the run, a gentleman wisely said, “Mile 20 is half the rac...

One Day Wages has provided the birthday campaign idea and I have started a page on its website: Phyllis’ Birthday for a Cause. The story: I need not to repeat the global statistics on poverty and the dire needs around the world. We have all heard and seen enough to compel us to do something. For those of us who are Christians, “Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world” (James 1:27). The mandate is plain and simple, but easier said than done. A couple days before this year’s birthday, I got this daily verse in an email: “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also” (Matthew 6:21). Even though salvation cannot be gained, but our walk of life reveals our faith and our inner reality. Looking at my bank account, I question where my true treasure is found. Everyday we are faced with different choices, like where and how to spend our money? When Moses came be...

Ran through Uptown Charlotte and climbed 683’ with over 1300’ elevation change along with a couple thousand runners, I finished my half marathon in 1:48:09 last Sunday. Here’s me with my finisher’s medal, adding to my collection of six this year. The concept of a finisher’s medal is foreign to my grandma. She still thinks I’ve won all the races. (Wouldn’t that be nice…)

Today is the first day of Advent - the fourth Sunday before Christmas that marks the beginning of a time of waiting and expecting. It is only appropriate that it follows right after Thanksgiving which leads us to enter into this period of time with thankfulness. At church today, we sang: Jesus paid it all; All to Him I owe. Sin had left a crimson stain, He washed it white as snow Think about it. The two biggest problem all humans have to deal with are sin and death. And Jesus has taken care of both. Talk about freedom. Jesus has broken the chain of death and our slavery to sin. 2 Corinthians 5 says: Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. This is the scripture which led me to Christ and I was being reminded of this once again today. Talk about a new life. When we were young, my sister once asked God for a new sister, a replacement. Last time I heard, she was pretty happy with the “new” sister God has granted her. I hav...

Without a car might be a hindrance in many ways, but it is also a blessing in disguise in many ways. Over the years I discover how much riding a bike, or running for that matter, has in common with our Christian walk. In difficult times, in times which I want to stop, it teaches me perseverance and what faithfulness looks like. Exhaustion doesn’t just happen during physical activities. Prophet Elijah asked God to take his life after a day’s journey in the wilderness. At the brink of giving up, I learn that faithfulness is a long obedience in one direction, as Eugene Peterson says in his book. It’s keep-going when every part of you scream stop. People like to say, “If marathon is easy, everyone will be doing it.” Likewise, there’s no turning back in being a Christian and it’s not easy. I have also learned the importance of one step at a time. When I’m getting tired on hills, I tend to put my head down and pedal. Looking at that formidable hill doesn’t give me energy but instills fear....

“Holy, holy, holy is the LORD of hosts; the whole earth is full of his glory!” Holiness is a description of God, a sum of all His divine attributes. His glory is the radiance of His holiness displayed. In essence, there is nothing worth desiring more than the holiness of God. When John Piper unpacked what it meant for our lives, he asked: How [and/or when] do you feel being loved by God? Perhaps when He gives us what I want? Perhaps when I feel like being used by God? Maybe when He is making much of me? This can’t be more wrong. Think about it. What does God desire? As much as He loves us, He ought to desire The Best, the infinite valuable, which is His holiness. Jesus, “the radiance of the glory of God and the exact imprint of his nature (Hebrew 1:3),” is His holiness make accessible. Logically speaking, this implies that the goal of salvation and of creation is not us, but His holiness. His love for us is not so that we could make much of ourselves, but we could make much of Him and ...

I can now testify to the truthfulness of running the last third of a marathon with your heart. Physique plays an important part of the game, but at mile 20, everyone feels crappy. At the end, it is the mind who keeps one going, keeps one persevering, and keeps one enduring pain. During the last few miles, I really wanted to stop. My legs are sore, my feet hurt, and my knees feel like they could buckle anytime. My body probably really hated me for not listening, but I had to go with my heart that said no stopping. To my rescue, my friend Greg Hassen from Southcoast Road Runners found me and ran me in at mile 22. That was tremendous help. Perhaps I would have really stopped if he didn`t pace me and kept me companied. Thank God for sending help right when I needed it. Although I didn`t meet my arbitrary goal of 4:30, I was happy about the race. It was arbitrary because I never ran 26.2 miles in my life. Running an 8 minute pace on a 10 mile run doesn`t mean I could do the same for another...

“In Jesus’ name, amen.” We all close our prayers with that. However, how often do we left Jesus out in the bulk of our prayer until the very end? How often do we begin our prayers with a list of request, follow by more requests, and just reiterate “In Jesus’ name, amen” like we always do to close it off. In Praying Backwards, author and president of Covenant Theological Seminary urges us “to use that routine phrase as the premise and basis for prayer,” rather than stamping God’s name at the end to seal the deal. For architects, our list (and the clients’) of requests is replaced with programs and budgets. Perhaps it would be more feasible for clients (in our case, churches) to come to us with just a budget and a list of programs, do away with BlueSky and charette and dive right into the solution. But without first listening to God and without God’s vision as our premise and basis of our design, what we are responding to are just needs. In Who’s your city, author Richard Florida named a...

The Social Network, a film which narrates the inception of Facebook reminded me the joy I had learning programming as a high schooler. I remember writing really simple programs using C++ and made my first web page in basic html in grade 10. The joy came from creating and problem solving. Nothing like spending hours cracking a puzzle and in the process, creating something out of nothing, ex nihilo. Type in a string of codes and integers and something wonderful comes out of it. This makes me wonder whether God had the same satisfaction creating the world. He is the only one truly created something out of nothing (“creatio ex nihilo”). He spoke, and the world came into existence. He saw what He made, and “behold, it was very good.” We are all on God’s Facebook. He invited all of us to be His friends.

The list of things I learned from a lonesome 20.91-mile run is almost synonymous with the things-I-have-done-wrong list. First off, I shouldn’t be running alone. Running partner(s) is priceless. American Express should make a commercial out of that. Second, which is an extension of the first, I wasn’t prepared to be running alone. Last week when I did my first 20 miler with my friend, he lent me his glide, gel, and gatorade. This time, I had water and a granola bar. Although it worked out fine - aka I survived - but I could have done better. Third, I didn’t take into account the heat. Starting at 7am at around 70 degrees, it reached 80s pretty soon. Running through pavement under the scorching sun was miserable. As a result of these compounded mistakes, I had to walk a lot more this time than last and took 4 hours to finish. Despite all that, it was still a very good learning experience, which I could say as I lay comfortably on my bed with a roof (and fan) over my head.

“The work is great and widely spread, and we are separated on the wall, far from one another. In the place where you hear the sound of the trumpet, rally to us there. Our God will fight for us.” -Nehemiah 4:20 Ever wonder how to balance having faith in God and working with our hands? This chapter of Nehemiah answers that for me. Nehemiah was a royal cup-bearer at the palace of Shushan, serving king Artaxerxes of the Persian empire in the post-exilic era in Jewish history. During the reign of the Persian empire, three groups of Jewish people were able to return. The first in 536 BC under the leadership of Zerubbabel, second group in 458 BC under Ezra, and finally the third group in 445 BC under Nehemiah. Three things that were integral to their identity as God’s people were restored: the Law, the temple, and the wall of Jerusalem. The book of Nehemiah records the account of the rebuilding of the wall. Though Nehemiah got the favor of the king to return, not everything is smooth sailing....

So the men turned from there and went toward Sodom, but Abraham still stood before the Lord. Then Abraham drew near and said, “Will you indeed sweep away the righteous with the wicked? -Genesis 18:22-23 Reflection on Pastor Tim Keller’s “Real Friendship and the Pleading Priest”: Here’s story we’ve heard over and over: Abraham interceded for the city, Sodom. He bargained all the way from pardoning the city for 50 righterous people down to just one. But here is what I have been missing: Abraham understood that the righteous could save the unrighteous by his righteousness. When Abraham stood before God, He didn’t asked God to abandon His judgment or His righteousness. He didn’t ask, “Well God, why don’t you just forgo who you are for once and overlook their sin?” Rather, he asked, “Will you then sweep away the place and not spare it for the fifty righteous who are in it?” (v24) In other words, Abraham knows God loves the righteous; and for their sake, God pardons the unjust. God cares mor...

Now the Lord said to Abram, “Go from your country and your kindred and your father’s house to the land that I will show you. Genesis 12:1 From there he moved to the hill country on the east of Bethel and pitched his tent, with Bethel on the west and Ai on the east. And there he built an altar to the Lord and called upon the name of the Lord. Genesis 12:8 Being a Christian means we don’t always get our terms with God, though we know that the loving Father will not give us a serpent when we ask for a fish (Luke 11:11). But like Abraham, God did ask him to trust Him and let go of his human tendancy to control and to know everything. In Genesis, God simply told Abrahma to “get yourself out of there.” To where? “I’ll show you later.” Later, He promised Abraham a son. When? And how? “I’ll show you later.” There is no “I’ll follow if I know this, this and this,” or, “I’ll follow if this make sense.” Hence, the authority of God and His words, and the granted faith and obedience on our part to ...

“So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:7-9 I have a cyst on my shoulder close to the collarbone for over two years. Two weeks ago, it got infected. It started to swell, and caused pain and discomfort. Sitting on it for a couple of days, I finally went to see a doctor who put me on an antibiotic but to no avail. This week I went to a general surgeon who was reluctant to drain it because it is still infected and put me on even stronger antibiotics. Still, the half-a-golf-ball sized cyst is still sitting on my shoulder, as if it’d explode any moment. “A cyst is a closed, saclike structure that contains fluid, gas, or semisolid material and is not a...

“Lord, now you are letting your servant depart in peace, according to your word; for my eyes have seen your salvation that you have prepared in the presence of all peoples, a light for revelation to the Gentiles, and for glory to your people Israel.” -Simeon in Luke 2:29 Do you know why you do what you do? Eric Liddel, a missionary and winner of the Men’s 400 metres at the 1924 Summer Olympics held in Paris, said in Chariots of Fire, “I believe God made me for a purpose, but he also made me fast. And when I run I feel His pleasure.” Harold Abraham, the winner of 100m sprint at the same Olympic said, “I will raise my eyes and look down that corridor; 4 feet wide, with 10 lonely seconds to justify my existence.” John Coltrane, one of the most significant tenor saxophonists in jazz history, found his reason of being as he states, “[d]uring the year 1957, I experienced, by the grace of God, a spiritual awakening which was to lead me to a richer, fuller, more productive life. At that time, ...

My new normal includes a 9 mile bike ride to work, and another 9 mile back, Monday to Friday. For cyclists, that’s hardly a workout. For those who drive everywhere, that’s unfathomable. For me, it’s a conviction, a choice, and a gift. Aside from some apparent benefits, like saving money and the environment, biking early in the morning and at the end of a work day mean having quiet down times with myself and God. I can’t think of a better way to start as well as to end a day. Biking isn’t always easy, especially the steady climb-up on the way home. Head wind and rude drivers are not my friends. I had cars brushed up against me, or honk at me because I was riding on a bike-lane-turned-right-turn-lane. But still, I have nothing to complain about. I’ve seen women and children needing to hike half a day up a mountain to get clean water every single day. I’ve seen people sleeping on dirt at our gate over night. What is a 45-minute bike ride compare to these? If it is anything at all, it’d be...

Re-entry is tougher than I anticipated. It’s not a stretch to say that this is actually the toughest time thus far. Perhaps it was because the things I saw and experienced were far more than what I prepared myself to. I didn’t expect to see mothers and children sleeping at our gate overnight to line up for clinic. I didn’t expect to see 60 struggling children cramped in a very tight space, knowing that this was still far better than the living situation they came from. I didn’t expect to see five year-olds as tiny as one-year-olds, and not knowing whether they’d make it to the next day or not. I saw a man carrying a little black wooden casket one day and my heart sinked. Reading through the information about the ministry and the project is one thing, seeing and living with it on a day-to-day basis is another. I still have flashbacks of different moments in our trip. They come and go. I could be talking to someone in this instance and found myself drifted away by memories the next. To s...

Saturday was the big day to present the ministry our design. Sarah recaptured the process we went through this week and presented the design of the masterplan and work team facility. Both were well received. Like our project leader has been saying, “we are right where we are supposed to be,” and looking to move forward as the Spirit leads. While the trip is winding down to a conclusion, the project has only started. Sunday, we took a day off and headed to the beach. The day was spent between hanging out at a rock beach (instead of sand), enjoying some good food and company, bargaining with vendors, and a volleyball game with a few Brazilian soldiers. Oh, and for the first time in 9 days, I slept through the night without sweating in an air-conditioned space. Monday began with a 4 am hike. Earliest hike ever. We ascended the mountain with flash lights, and came down with the sun rising behind us. I love mountains. I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come? My help com...